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| Movie Review: The Men Who Stare at Goats Alternate Title: Return of the Jedi
Story: This is a little film
that sadly, is dead on arrival. So what happened? It had an interesting
premise but director Grant Heslov did not seem to have
a point of view. It rambled, zig zagged, was unfocused and downright
disappointing. It was written by Peter Straughan and
based on the nonfiction book by Jon Ronson. A young reporter, who is going through a divorce,
is looking for meaning and excitement in his life. He wants to get to
Iraq and do some serious war reporting. Unsuccessful at that endeavor,
he latches on to an older soldier who was part of special unit of 'monk-warriors'
back in the 80's. These soldiers were trained to use their psychic power
to thwart the enemy. Various methods were used in this cockamamie division
including remote viewing, psychedelic drugs and staring down goats until
their hearts stopped. (The silence of the goats). If that sounds confusing, you can imagine watching
it for 90 minutes. The film hobbles back and forth from past to present
and is clumsy in its efforts. It is supposed to be an anti-war spoof
but unfortunately it is a bust. Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SreufFevUSw Acting: George Clooney as Lyn Cassady repeats his
performance from Brother, Where art Thou? Lots of eye-popping and rolling.
But then again, I like to just look at George Clooney. He does not have
to do anything. Ewan McGregor as the young reporter
plays his innocent (Moulin Roube) character and his accent is terrible.
Jeff Bridges as Bill Django is The Dude, from the Big
Lebowski (one of my favorite films). Kevin Spacey is
nuts and has a terrible wig.
Trivia: Director Grant Heslov directed
the short film Waiting for Woody (1998) about a Woody Allen fan. In
2006, Grant was competing for an Oscar in the same category as Woody
Allen. He often works with George Clooney. Predilection: None
Critters: Goats, gerbils
Food: Twizzlers, eggs
Sex Spectrum: Some brief butt shots and a few boobies
in a hot tub.
Soundtrack: Eclectic (Boston's More than a Feeling
is all I remember)
Opening Titles: A sequence about the young reporter.
Visual Art: It is filmed in the desert of New Mexico
(instead of Iraq)
Theater Audience: Five old goats and me.
Weather: Hot
Drift Factor: I started drifting after 30 minutes.
Predictability Level: I did not care
Tissue Usage: 0
Oscar Worthy: No
Big Screen or Rental: Neither
Length: 90 painful minutes
LOBO HOWLS: 3 |